Comic Jeff is a real hot potato

4:03pm Wednesday 16th January 2002

What makes a comedian? What is in your character that makes you want to get up on stage and run the risk of heckling or dying on stage'?

How do you know you have a talent for making people laugh?

When I spoke with the award- winning Jeff Green I found some answers to these questions, and warmed to a man who, despite being 37, still had a boyish freshness in his manner and voice and had me roaring with laughter.

Yet Jeff also revealed the key to his successful career. This leading light of the alternative comedy scene comes to the Ashcroft Theatre, Croydon, on Thursday, January 24.

What the show holds in store will be a mix of his perceptions and he will grapple with human problems like growing up and dating.

And it was while Jeff was growing up that he honed his razor sharp wit.

Born in Chester, his parents divorced and his mother went on to marry two more times. Jeff was one of seven children from these marriages and lived in a pretty volatile household it seems.

"I've had three dads. Very early on I found that being funny and playing the clown got me attention," he said.

"I can remember my dad and mum arguing a lot. When we heard the fighting as youngsters it was frightening. I suppose I used comedy to diffuse the tension. I'd go into the room and play the fool and be daft to make them stop quarelling."

Jeff has plenty of praise for his current step-father.

"He is a real a nice bloke, he's brilliant, we have a good relationship. My birth' father though I only go to see when I need more material about stingy people.

"Do you know he's learning Greek and Hebrew at the moment because he's got cable TV and they're the free channels!"

Brought up on the comedy of Dave Allan and Dick Emery and originally working in chemical engineering "I sold oxyacetalene to welders" Jeff assures me he hasn't been an overnight success.

"When you get onto the television finally and become recognised, most stand-ups have had years of performing in the small clubs and rooms above pubs, " he said.

This is the reason he looks smart on stage.

"I can't understand why some guys get up on stage looking scruffy when they are playing the big gigs. I saw Stan Boardman go out on stage once as if he just walked off the golf course.

"We start off in our jeans and t-shirts, but I think we must show respect for the audience. They have paid a lot of money to come and see you. You have to raise your game.

"Fear for me is not being able to live up to the suit!"

In his new tour I read that Jeff wants to find out how girls take off a bra under their t-shirt.

"Is it the same lesson they learn how to put a towel on their head after washing their hair?" he wondered.

Well, the bra trick I could enlighten him on.

Jeff has become a familiar face on our TV screens. He's made his fifth appearance on Never Mind The Buzzcocks, his fourth on The Clive James Show, and his third on They Think It's All Over.

The ITV special Jeff Green Live was recently repeated on ITV.

At the end of this month he will be seen again on a new panel game He is team captain in Jo Brand's Hot Potatoes on BBC1.

What's this all about?

"We debate various issues that Jo throws at us. Les Dennis is the other team captain. The programme is a bit like pub arguments. You know after a few drinks some crazy views on life are revealed."

Jeff has been to Fairfield before when he supported Jo Brand on tour. He has also played the Warehouse Theatre, Dingwall Road, before taking his act to the Edinburgh Fringe Festival.

He has written for films, for Lee Evans and his old friend Jack Dee.

The day we spoke he was off to get his girlfriend from the airport.

"I am, as they say, in a relationship'. In fact I'm writing my first book The A to Z of Living Together. This is from general research not personal stuff. It's like when I write about my father it's not all just him, it's an amalgamation of other dads I've heard things about."

So with his observations that are as sharp as his suit, it should be a great night at The Ashcroft Theatre.

Jeff Green is a bright performer and a very charming chap to chat with. The performance starts at 7.45pm and tickets are £12 and £10.