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Hox in the Box: "2014 will be a year to remember"
Of the many ridiculous New Year resolutions taken up by the masses, how many will actually last? Very few I’d guess. It’s more of a tradition to break them than keep them, after all.
Face it, the gym passes that seemed such a wise investment this week will more than likely serve as an unwelcome reminder of just how weak-willed you really are before the weekend’s out.
You’ll probably make excuses. I do. You’ll tell yourself outright lies, like “exercise is overrated,” or else you’ll convince yourself that doughnuts are in fact a major food group.
It is for this reason that my resolution does not involve far-fetched exercise regimes. In fact, it’s the opposite of abstinence, and so easily kept.
My resolution is plain and simple: to watch, talk about and consume in any and every way possible more sport than last year.
And why not? The next 12 months promises a veritable feast of sporting highlights, chief amongst them being the World Cup in Brazil this summer.
If indeed there actually is a World Cup.
Many of Brazil's stadiums are way behind schedule. Even Sepp blatter says so.
Having had a mere seven years to prepare for what should be a spiritual homecoming for football, the Brazilian FA now face the alarming truth that no country has ever been as far behind as they are in preparing for the biggest football tournament in the world.
This despite having more time than any other nation to get ready for what should be an almost religious experience in a football-mad country.
Combine that with the added pressure from the Brazilian public who will demand that their team bring home the trophy to add to the four already tucked up nicely at Brazil FA HQ, and it could all go very wrong in South America this summer.
But that’s the summer. The immediate concern for football fans is the January transfer window and the potentially ludicrous sums of money set to be parted with for (if previous years are anything to go by) distinctly average players.
Arsenal never buy anyone in January, Chelsea seem intent on sticking with Fernando Torres - why is anyone's guess - and Liverpool seem to have had their fill of middle-of-the road footballers and are still saddled with Aspas, who makes Borini look like a top talent.
But the scousers are less in need of players than great rivals Manchester United.
The current champions could do with some serious cash being spent, but it does beg the question: on who?
Ambitious attempts to lure the likes of Fabregas and Ronaldo away from the sun-drenched shores of Spain with the promise of a couple of Eccles cakes and a pint of Boddingtons have failed miserably.
And you could argue the need for a marquee signing is even more important now than it was six months ago, with a distinctly average squad coming up short yet again against the woefully erratic Swansea City in the FA Cup.
With millions at his disposal Moyes should look no further than his old club to solve what could be the most defining transfer period of his entire career.
The solution is obvious. Sign Ross Barkley now for whatever it would cost to sway the opinion of chairman Bill Kenwright, and it ticks all the boxes for what is required of a Manchester United manager.
United are no longer title contenders, that much is plain for all to see.
But if Moyes doesn’t do something about a central midfield area which has been so desperately lacking all season, then the club will be turning out on a Thursday night next season against the likes of St Gallen.
Buy now or pay for it later, David. You have been warned.
Now pass me a doughnut.
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