A close friend of mine reckons that there's a very real chance that an English team will loosen the tight Spanish grip and win the Champions League this season.

That same close friend is a Spurs fan and has not only had to endure his team's exit, but also a post-match assertion from Juventus defender Giorgio Chiellini that the north London team "always miss something at the end".

The notion that English teams can often choke is a total nonsense, in my opinion. Arsenal have been accused of it before now and the national side is often pilloried for not fulfilling potential.

My suspicion though, is that it's because our teams just aren't quite good enough.

There is such obscene hype surrounding the Premier League - players' price tags are through the roof along with their wages, there are endless live games on TV and if that's not enough, a veritable feast of "pundit" shows bask in the new technology available.

It doesn't seem like too long ago that we were introduced to the brave new world of an "assist" (particularly pertinent if you own a Fantasy Football team), but it's spiralling out of control now.

Graphics showing where and how many touches a player had on the pitch are commonplace, as are heat maps, distance covered, tackles made etc etc.

But these enlightening statistics always appear after the game, so they are not really telling us anything more than we already know.

Let's say that Harry Kane doesn't score for once, so we'll then find out where and how often he touched the ball on the pitch. Surprise, surprise, he didn't have many touches in the penalty area. Well who'd have thought?

Personally I'd like to know more stats about the people behind the players:

1, What music were they listening to through those absurdly large headphones that they wear on the walk from team coach to dressing room (yes, even that "action" is filmed these days).

2, What did they have for breakfast? I reckon there'd be a few sneaky bacon butties taken down on matchday morning, especially amongst some of the lower teams (is there a correlation, I wonder?).

3, What is the average length of time that it takes a player to tweet a "thank you to our magnificent fans" after the final whistle has been blown?

4, How often do the players think about changing their car? With such funds available, the once-every-blue-moon purchases that the average car owner makes would be knocked into a cocked hat by some of the young petrolheads on show in the Prem.

5, What did they get for their last birthday? David Beckham slipped into a sari at the height of his stylistic fame. I've no idea if it was a birthday present, but I bet there are some varied requests from those who already have it all.

6, What's the worst/funniest put-down you've ever heard from someone in the crowd?

7, When your team is knocked out of the Champions League, do you want all the other English teams to be knocked out too?

8, What would be your alternative choice of career? Most of them will say a football coach or an airline pilot. Yawn.

9, Which other footballer do you hate the most and why?

10, If you could invite four guests for dinner (dead or alive), who would they be? Ex or current footballers not allowed.

Back in the Champions League, Chelsea will be out by this time next week, along with Spurs and quite possibly Manchester United.

So that leaves leaky Liverpool and the only English team that has a chance of winning the thing - Manchester City.

If they do win it, let's hope John Stones and Kyle Walker are more than just bench-warming token Englishmen.